No payload

I’ve discovered a positive in being a bit under the weather – my husband collected the Monkey-face AND she arrived home all buoyant, face shining with fervant concern for me. “Mummy, I’ll make you better.” She was a real treat and there was not a single tantrum before bed (I think I’ll feign sickness with greater regularity.)

She was very keen that we read together and she collected her German airport book, which I would hardly call reading on account of the complete lack of words in the book at all. But, she loves scouring the busily detailed pages for interest upon which to comment and things to count. She was less impressed with the book I had bought for her in the mistaken belief it was about Potty Training. I mean, what on earth else could the rather grimly named Here Comes the Poo Bus by Andy Stanton and Noelle Davies-Brock be about. This book is what bizarre is all about. As well as a malevolent toad. It couldn’t be odder if it had been written by Noel Fielding and illustrated by The League of Gentleman. I suppose that would at least have the saving grace of being funny and wry. It’s not about potty training and yet… hard to explain Noelle’s illustrated graphic smudges and smears otherwise.

I just don’t understand how poo fits in at all.

Perhaps it will all come out tomorrow, when I am feeling less cack.

When the time came for which the book had been purchased (not sure why the sudden coyness regarding Monkey-face’s poo phobia), I tried to entice her onto the loo with said book. A deeply unimpressed MF dead-panned. “No mummy, I don’t like the poo bus.” And there was no payload. Even the fact that the illustrator has signed this book (in ink, thankfully) which I didn’t spot when I bought it can’t save it.

There’s no-one on board this time.

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